Showing posts sorted by relevance for query mother's. Sort by date Show all posts
Showing posts sorted by relevance for query mother's. Sort by date Show all posts

Monday, May 25, 2009

My Mother's Day Tradition

I have a strange Mother's Day Tradition. Every year I try my hardest to get out of anything remotely related to mothering. I was raised in a home where this particular holiday was scary at best. The Saturday before we could already see that the next day was going to be a disaster. You could hear the ticking. Tick tick tick tick. The house wouldn't be clean, (tick tick) we kids would probably fight (tick tick) and hide one of our church shoes some place. One of use would break her obligatory sacrament meeting carnation. (tick tick) Or everything could go pretty good. (tick? tick?) It didn't matter. Mother's day was a day when Mom cried. BOOM!! Why? I don't know. What is even harder to explain is why I carried this tradition on into my own home. I'm terrible. I don't like my presents - even if it is a very thoughtful breast pump or vacuum. I'm mad when I have to make my own dinner. Don't EVEN get me started on breakfast in bed. Why would i want to eat cheerios in my bed with four kids climbing on me begging for bites? It's an unwinnable day for my family and so now as a special treat to myself, I try to be as far from my children as possible. 

I've done pretty good. I was in Arizona a few years back for Courtney's baptism, I was in France two years ago for a medical conference with Jaymeson, I was stuck penniless in Barcelona and London last year and this year I was supposed to be in Mexico. Stupid swine flu wrecked that. We had to cancel our cruise and I started panicking. What? Home for Mother's Day? No way. Jaymeson was relieved by the cancellation because it really was bad timing for him due to the fact that his boards are in a couple weeks. He decided to keep that week off work so he could study. That's when the wheels started turning. A free babysitter for a week (I conveniently didn't hear the part about the studying). Just for fun, I looked up flights to Hawaii. Sara lives there and said I could come visit whenever. Just for more fun, I booked a $350/RT flight and took her up on her offer.

I went to Hawaii ALONE FOR A WEEK. Best week ever. Not only did I cross the Pacific and got to a whole new place, I went back in time. I was in college again. A little older and frumpier, but oh so happy. Sara goes to BYU-Hawaii. We did all the things you're supposed to do in college: we broke into resorts to use their hot tub; we climbed up onto the roof of the apartment to watch the stars; we took silly pictures of ourselves with strangers on campus; we ate way too much and slept way too little. It was awesome. 

When I got there, the rental place's computers were down, so they gave me a Jeep. We became fast friends. We spent the week in the sun listening to music together. It played "all of Hawaii's best music- not just some of it." It didn't have ONE fruit snack in it. 



(this is us in the LOST trees)

I love Oahu. I felt like it was my home. I want to live there. The first morning I was upside down in time so I got up and went for a walk about 5am. I tried to find the beach but I found the temple instead.  It was Mother's Day and I was leaning up next to a palm tree at the temple in Hawaii watching the sun rise. There were hymns playing from a speaker at the base of the tree. The whole time I sat there, nobody patted my arm to get my attention so they could tell me that Mason was naked. Nobody asked me for a sippy full of milk. Hallelujah! Hallelujah! 



On Monday, we went snorkeling at Sharks' Cove and swimming at a beach that starts with a "W". Later we got Thai food and shave ice at Matsumoto's. It was delicious. I think I got Stwauva Gwaberry. I only had to buy one for myself. Nobody spilled. Luxury.

Then I went on a date with a guy who was only using me to get to my roommates. We ate raw salty fish with onions called poke. 

On Tuesday, we hiked and hiked and hiked and finally came to the path that was the beginning of the hike. We hiked some more and made it to Muanawilli (sp?) falls. That was BEAUTIFUL. And scary. Since I was in college again, we took this opportunity to be both brave and stupid. Sara and I climbed up the tallest cliff and after telling ourselves we could do hard (stupid) things, we clasped hands and jumped!! It was three times "where's the water!?" high or maybe about 50 feet? Higher? I'll tell you something else... come closer - it's a secret... when you jump off really high cliffs, keep your legs together. 



We ate some more, went to some beaches and made it home just in time for the night show at the PCC. Sara and Gina (you can pronounce her name so many fun ways in public places REALLY LOUD) work there, so I got in for super cheap. That was cool. Watching ladies shake and men burn themselves. We found out we could take pictures of us with the burn victims. That's when I realized my camera was gone. Sad. Embarrassing. Maybe we took some pictures of ourselves "college-style" in the jungle and we didn't really want people to see them? We must have left it at the beach when that wave crashed over us when we were sleeping. 



So we decided we'd go back and find it the next day after our adventures at the swap meet. Yes!! That was a happy place. Cheap t-shirts and dried mangoes as far as the eye could see. I bought matchy dresses for my girls and a cool carved bone necklace for us to represent our Ikaika-selves that jumped off that cliff. 

We journeyed on to Hanauma Bay. I had told Sara that all I really wanted out of the whole week was to see a turtle. (I have a turtle thing.) We were barely in the water when we found a big, beautiful sea turtle. He was pleased to meet us. He didn't care that we were there at all. We just followed him around and probably touched him. I can't say for sure because it's against the law. He beat out the Jeep as my new best friend.

(not my picture)

We went back to the beach where we had lost the camera and before I even said a word, the lifeguard said,"you lost your camera, right?" Hooray and dang. Hooray for the camera, dang that he had obviously seen the pictures. He didn't have said camera, but he gave me the # of the guy who did. We had to wait until the next day to call him. 

To fill the time, Phil took us surfing! I didn't do too bad, but I lack the upper body strength need to get that long board out past the waves over and over. I felt very wimpy. But happy that I stood up once and that I got to see the sunset sitting on a surfboard in Hawaii. Thanks, Phil.



Then Thursday happened. Let us never speak of it again. It was a bad day. We got the camera back from other lifeguards who had obviously also looked at the pictures but the batteries were missing and all the pictures were deleted. Even the ones of us spelling korean words with our bodies and some random koreans on the steps of the CAC. Sara and I were sad all that day. It was not the right day for me to leave. We knew it but were powerless to stop it. There were no turtles at Hanauma Bay. I had to drop Sara off at a bus station to get home while I got lost looking for the rental return place. When I got to the airport I was so sad. The lady at the counter told me my flight was delayed 4 hours and in typical shelby-in-college fashion, I started to cry. Stupid Thursday. Stupid leaving too soon. Luckily, grown-up Shelby reminded me that I do control my destiny a little. I walked back up to the counter and asked for a redo. This was a bad day. It was not the day I was supposed to leave. Could I stay another day and start over? She said,"You'd do that?? Oh that's great! That really helps us." Turns out the flight had been cancelled while I was crying and they were trying to get everyone on a 7am flight the next morning. So wish-granted, I left the airport to take a scary 3 hour bus ride back to Sara's.

My redo day was much better. We woke up early and got banana pancakes bigger than us. We went swimming again and then spent the rest of the day alone on a beautiful beach. We laid in 6 inches of warm water on sand-pillows. We laughed our heads off and made our plans for next time. When I got back to the airport that night I felt so much better and was ready to leave. It wasn't that I wanted to, but more that I felt I could. My battery-recharge was complete and I was ready and excited to face my real life again.


So, I have much thanks. I'm thankful for Sara (and Gina - pronounced so many wonderful ways) who let a frumpymomoffour live their life with them for a few days. They were more fun than I even thought they'd be. I was smiling and laughing the ENTIRE time I was there. They are so sweet and fun and happy and good. I love Sara. She's the best. When I met her a few years ago, it wasn't like meeting somebody new. It was more like,"Oh THERE you are! I've been looking for you." She makes me so happy. She also looks gorgeous with a mask and a snorkel. Who does that? She's so beautiful. Inside and out. Thank you so much, Sara. I miss you REALLY LOUD.

And then the other thanks. Thanks to Jaymeson for the best Mother's Day ever. Thanks for taking care of the kids while they wrestled in 12 bananas. Thanks for never complaining or acting like you resented me for leaving. I couldn't have had 1/100th the time I had if it weren't for your love and support. You are too good to me. You can be a jerk-nose for the rest of our life and still come out ahead because of this. I love you so much. Next time, come with me.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Baby Beckham

Starting about last December, when people would ask me when I was due, I'd say,"May 27 but I'm having him May 7." I had made up my mind that I was getting that sucker out the first Saturday after he was full-term. It would be perfect. Jaymee wouldn't have to miss work, I'd get to stop being pregnant (which I hate with the fire of a thousand suns), I'd get to be away from home on Mother's Day (a long-standing tradition in my home so that my family can stay alive), it's my best friend Mami's birthday, he'd be old enough to travel to Utah for Jamey's wedding in June . . . it was brilliant, brilliant, brilliant.

So I rubbed my belly and told it the plan. May 7. May 7. May 7. On May 2nd I started having contractions and went in to the hospital. They sent me to the mall to walk and walk and walk and then come back when the labor gotten bad enough that I killed somebody in Naartjie. Six hours later, the contractions had stopped altogether. It was fine with me because I still had some stuff to do and he wasn't supposed to come until MAY 7.

On May 6, I went to lunch with a bunch of friends and they joked with me,"tomorrow's the big day, right?!" I affirmed that it was indeed. There was some eye-rolling but I told my uterus to pay them no mind. They didn't know the deal we had made.

About 6am on May 7, I woke up with hard contractions. Jaymee woke up to laughter. Ha! Ha! It's May 7 and I'm in labor! We called Mami and told her she could have all the Cardinals tickets because we were heading to hospital! Stop by after the game to see the baby! We got our stuff together and left. When we arrived, they confirmed I was indeed in labor and gave me an epidural within 30 seconds of getting there, bless their hearts. About that time I got a snarky text from Amy saying, "how's the hooossspital??" I told her everything was great and I had just gotten my epi. WHAT?! Ah ha ha ha. So funny.
(our three seconds together)


Everything went perfectly. No pain. A push and a half and I was done. It's easy to deliver a five pound baby. I saw him for about three seconds and they stole him and started freaking out. Well, as much as baby docs freak out. Baby Beckham couldn't breathe. SO they whisked him away to the NICU to live for the next eight days. Poor little guy.



(poor little guy)



(Mother's Day. It was a very fancy NICU. Ties were NOT optional)


They hooked him up to a bunch of monitors and machines and put so much tape on his face that his eyes swelled shut. He had only seen the world for about and hour. Sad. The first day they let me hold him. I spent all my time with him. The next day, they wouldn't let me hold him and they wouldn't let him eat. Did I mention poor little guy? It was killing me. They kept telling me that I'd be able to hold him "tomorrow". Then on tomorrow, they'd tell me the same thing again. I should have been blogging back then but I was sad and didn't want to be away from his bedside for one minute. On Tuesday they discharged me (no discharge cookies this time). I went to live in the NICU and then on a hard chair in the hall when I wasn't allowed in there. They took pity on my and let me back in my room for another two nights. On Tuesday night he took a turn for the worse and they had to intubate him. (PLG - poor little guy) Whatever they gave him while intubated did the trick and he turned around within twelve hours. On Wednesday I was holding him and feeding him a drop or two (they are stingy). But that night I had to go home. No empty rooms. Just empty arms as I left the hospital which is 45 minutes away. That was awful. I was back first thing in the morning and he was moved on to just oxygen through a nasal canula instead of the big apap thing. They took some of the tape off his face. I could almost see it. When I got there on Friday morning, they had taken off even more tape and I could see his whole face. Man was he cute. He even opened his eyes for the first time in a week.

He was eating like a champ and they said he could go home if he passed the "car seat test".


(Look how tiny! It's like that old skit with the girl in the HUGE chair. Was that Hee-Haw?)

We brought him home and I realized that I had been so worried about him at the hospital that I hadn't remembered that I had had a baby. I was fine. I had been taking my meds like clockwork and somehow didn't even notice the healing. It was so bad with Preslie that I was crying for days. Tender mercy much?
(ten days old. can anyone resist a baby yawn?)



So that's what happened. Geez. Get off my back and let me go snuggle with the cutest baby ever. He's my best friend.


PS We sold Fiyero (the bird eating cat) and Hinckley got a fish hook through his paw that had to be removed by the vet. The turtle is fine. Suckers.